Fears

        Today I started thinking about how fears can truly be something different to what we usually associate them with. I myself have a mild arachnophobia, of course I can't say its a grave one because I've never had a tarantula on top of me or less touch one, so I don't know for sure how I would react to that, but I have cried over spiders so I'm definitely afraid of them. I'm also, ashamed I am to say so, still afraid of movies about spirits, monsters and so on. Yet I started thinking of how would it feel to be alone in a room with those fears. How would it feel, and this just gives me the chills just thinking about it, if a giant spider were to attack me and I had nowhere to run to or if a spirit were to chase me until it actually got a hold of me? What would happen? Would I die? Would I faint? Would my body stop working from the immense rush my body is going through? or would I actually encounter the greatest ecstasy (not in a sexual way) that I would ever feel?

       So I've basically concluded that the things we are most afraid of are the things that unconsciously would cause us the biggest thrill of our lives if they ever came true. The mind avoids somethings for so long that unwillingly it learns to desire it with that much intensity.

     Now that I've given my conclusion on what I think its the true nature of human fears I want to give my opinion on homophobia. Now a days homophobia is something that is very common among people. People that just cannot be around gays and bisexuals, they truly hate anyone who does not a have a heterosexual nature. In my opinion my theory relating fears applies perfectly to homophobia. Truth is that some studies say that we all have had gay inclinations. All men have admired another man at least for a few seconds from time to time. Of course a straight man would never admit to this, but its real. We woman have also admired another woman for a few seconds from time to time and even more since we are so exposed to provocative dressing styles and actions by women all around. So I believe there is no such a thing as a person who has never had homosexual tendencies. I believe that if a homophobic person ever had to have a homosexual experience it would end up being one of the best moments of their lives because such people are just scared to feel what they believe its wrong yet find so intriguing since its still taboo (in their minds at least).

     I also want to think about the people who are afraid of heights. My mom is afraid of them ever since she can remember, but I believe that if a person that is afraid of heights were to jump from an airplane (with a parachute on of course) and experience a safe landing they would tell you that it was one of the best experiences of their lives because that rush was so overwhelming that the fear became pure excitement. A few months ago she managed to do something that she had never done in her life, she went up with us to the top of the Rockefeller Center, which is a pretty high building, when we were finished she actually wanted to stay more time than I did because she was so excited and happy. And trust me this is something that a year ago I would never see her doing and even less loving at all since her fear has always been so great.

I guess many people can contradict but its just my way of seeing things, no more.